I Love You, Goodbye
by m.brown
Summary: How Elijah and Hayley's encounter before the wedding should have gone! One-shot


"You look perfect."

The words disrupted the silence like a gun shot, and they hurt just the same. Hayley looked up from where Hope was playing on the ground and stood smoothing out her dress. She turned towards the man who, though always dressed in a professional manner, looked awfully stunning in his black suit. Elijah was leaning on the doorframe like he had become accustomed to and just stared at her with the ghost of a smile on his lips. Hayley could feel the heat rising in her cheeks, but said nothing. Her stomach tingled in anticipation, but for all the wrong reasons it should be. It was her wedding day after all, yet here she stood wishing she could throw herself into the arms of another man.

Elijah looked at her in awe. He could not lie; this was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen in his life, and it hurt like hell. He wished more than anything that he could take her into his arms and whisk her away from this lie of a ceremony, which it was. He knew deep in his heart that she cared for the wolf, Jackson, but they did not and would not ever have the connection that was currently present in the room. It was impossible for anyone to have what they had. He thought about what he was to say to Hayley, this precious creature that he simply did not deserve, but thought it best to just tell her the truth that had been gnawing at him since he first laid eyes on her. Elijah swallowed and walked towards her.

"Hayley, I understand that this arrangement is important to your cause, and I will do nothing to dissuade you from it. I would be remiss if I didn't tell you, at least once-"

"Don't. Don't say it," she said softly. He immediately stopped in his tracks and felt his ability to breathe cease to exist. She cut him off because she could not bear to hear him say the words she had been longing for him to say all this time. She knew if she heard those simple little words, she would leave this house and all her responsibilities behind for this man. Elijah looked at her with raised eyebrows and an open mouth, but said nothing.

"You know, ever since the first day that I met you, I have felt _everything_ for you. And all this time, you were never able to say how you feel about me. And I get it- you can't just be the guy who says how he feels."

Elijah's heart lurched at these words. She had felt _everything_? The words wrapped themselves around his heart and squeezed hard. He too had felt almost every emotion he could ever imagine when it came to Hayley. He wished immensely that he could take back all the time he had spent with her and do it all again. He would've held her sooner. He would've kissed her sooner. He would've made love to her sooner. He sure as hell would've told her how he felt sooner. Despite the fact that he had spent over a thousand years on this earth, he found himself, for the first moment in his long life, wishing for more time.

"But Jackson is. And I think I can be happy with him."

Hayley saw his eyes fill with tears and it ripped her insides apart. It was almost as painful as her transition into a wolf. She felt every bone in her body break at the sight of a tear slipping down his face and could not stand to see how the always steady and emotionally confined Elijah, was falling apart due to the words she wished she didn't have to say.

"And I just want to be happy, Elijah. So, whatever you're going to say to me... please don't say it," she finally said. Hayley felt as though she was going to crumble into a million pieces. Elijah felt just about the same.

"Hayley, I…" Elijah choked out. She bit her lip and shook her head as she felt the tears begin to form. If he said another word she would break down, and she couldn't do that. She had to be strong for her pack and Jack. She had to be strong for Hope. She had to be strong for herself.

"Elijah, please. I can't… I can't hear you say it," she stuttered. Elijah took a step forward and closed the gap between them. His eyes still shone with tears, but there was determination in them. Hayley could feel the growing magnetism between them and it pained her not to give into the pull.

"Why?" he asked. It was unfair of her to deny him of the right to state his feelings, no matter the timing. Though he had to admit that he cursed himself for doing this to her at this moment, he couldn't let her go just yet.

"Because if you say it I won't be able to do this."

The answer made his throat constrict, but he swallowed the lump that had formed and cupped her face gently with his hands. She subconsciously leaned into them and Elijah could feel her warm breath on his palms. He took a deep breath and the words that had been bottled up inside of him for months spilled out.

"Of course you will do this. It is who you are and I will not stop you. I told you once before that you will always have a choice and I respect your decision, though it tears me to pieces. However, I think it is only fair that I get a choice as well. I am not a selfish man, Hayley, but I cannot deny that I wish to be selfish with you and have wanted to be for months now. The simple fact is that I am in love with you and I had to tell you that before I had lost you for good."

Tears streamed down Hayley's face as he spoke and in the back of her mind she thought about how she would need to redo her makeup as soon as the opportunity presented itself. All the things he was saying to her were all the right words she had wanted to hear for so long, but his timing was impeccably wrong. She felt his hands on her cheeks and couldn't help but shiver as his thumbs brushed away any stray tears.

"You will never lose me, Elijah. I couldn't bear life without you," she breathed, "but I have to do this. I have to do this for my pack and Hope. I just… I really need you to understand something, okay?"

Hayley grabbed one of his hands and held it in her own. She laced their fingers together and pulled him closer to her. She placed her other hand on his perfectly sculpted face and stroked her jaw with her thumb. She gazed into his mesmerizingly dark eyes and got lost in them for a moment before she remembered he was waiting for her to speak.

"I care about Jack. He has watched over me and protected me ever since I got here, and I will never be able to repay him for that. He's a great guy and truthfully I think that one day I could even love him. But Elijah… I am in love with you in a way that Jack will never know because _you_ are the only one that holds my heart," Hayley admitted. "And you're the only one that ever will."

A fresh stream of tears ran down her face and Elijah pulled her to him quickly. He held her tightly knowing that he may never get a chance to do so again. He glided his hands over the small of her back, up her spine, and anywhere else he could. He wanted to soak as much of her in as he could.

Hayley clung to him and wrapped her arms around his neck. She could feel his breath on her neck and his hands gently memorizing each inch of her. He smelled the way he always did, of pine and a certain dark musk she had no exact name for, but the effect it had on her at the moment made her knees buckle slightly. She ran a few fingers through the hair above the nape of his neck and sighed. There would be none of these moments for a long time.

"I will wait for you," Elijah murmured in her ear. "Whether it be twenty, thirty, forty, a hundred years; when Jackson is old and grey, yet you still shine as beautifully as you do today, I will be there."

Hayley pulled away and looked him in the eyes again. They were swimming with so many different emotions that she didn't know if she could keep the eye contact. So, she released her arms and traced his facial features with her hands. His eyes shut and her thumbs brushed over his temples, fluttered over his eyelids, and traced his nose. She spread her fingers across his cheeks and down to his chin before finally stopping at his mouth. Hayley pressed her own delicate lips to his in a farewell and stepped back knowing that no matter what happened down the road, this man would always be hers and she would be his.

"I love you, Elijah," she whispered. Elijah looked at her briefly before placing a kiss on her forehead.

"And I, you."


End file.
